Sunday, March 9, 2014

on lent pt. 1 [of?]


I don’t want to alienate anyone who reads this blog. I don’t want to “convert” anyone either. At the same time I want to be my authentic self. This means I believe in the God of the Bible. This also means I worship him. Perhaps not the way you are used to someone you know [or you yourself] worships him. Yet, I have come to a quite definitive conclusion that he not only exists, wants & loves me, he also has a purpose for me. I don’t know if I can put into words what on Earth that purpose is. Or even that I would know at this point. However, I am thoroughly convinced that he has one. Considering that as I write out my story I see how many times I could have & probably should have died & yet I did not. It is a sobering thing to have a medical doctor tell you: “Well, if you believe in God, then you should go home & thank him. Because he’s the only reason I can come up with that you are still alive. Medically, scientifically, you should have died today. Your being alive is against the laws of physics. Electricity does not behave this way. At least not normally.” In all of my days of being called a smart “a”/ “quick witted” person, this was a time I was quite speechless. What’s a snappy comeback for that? I had plenty of time to be reminded of this near to death experience. Since for a long time I had a pink burn mark up the side of my face. [I honestly don’t remember how many months it took before it went away.] However, I’m not posting here to tell the story of when I bled from my ear & went from being conscious standing in one place to being conscious four feet away sitting on the floor. Perhaps another time.
I’m going to post about Jesus. Lent is a time we think of his sacrifice for us. What it means to us. I don’t know if you’re ready for this. I’m not sure I am, either.
I have found it to be a sort of miracle that no one speaks of. At his trial, Jesus says very little. Jesus is God. We are told this quite definitively. He displayed this to great & dramatic effect. …so, this means that the same voice that spoke: “let there be light” & there was light. Said nothing to his own defense. You & I speak so carelessly with words. Often not realizing the weight of our words. The power of our words. The destruction our words can cause. The healing our words can bring. Jesus also said very little during his crucifixion. As I look at this truth. It speaks of how great Jesus is. His power & his wisdom & constraint. How much power you have is not nearly as important as how you wield it. You do realize, that at any point. He could have just said: “go to Hell”. The difference between him saying this, & you & I saying it, is that he would have been alone in minutes. Because when he says things, even the elements obey him. Can you imagine the restraint he HAD to have? All that power. And he just let them do that to him. For us. For you. For me. This leads me to 2 things he said. “he who seeks to save his life will loose it. He who looses his life, for my sake, will keep it for eternity.” [Luke 9:24] Jesus lived this out. I think it’s partly why he still has the scars. Only partly why, though. He became nothing, to be our everything. I’ve spent years wondering why the most important man ever kept his scars…& removed many of mine. [I do have a few left]

I’ll post the other thing he said in a few days/weeks. I’ve begun to write out a series here. So “stay tuned”. I’ll also speak of the other reason he kept his scars later.
[you have no idea how many different things I’ve thought of doing here over the next days/ weeks/ month. Wish me luck –or pray for me. As I figure out what to say/ share.]

May His grace drip from your fingers,
B

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