Tuesday, October 4, 2011

to hide... or not to?

Well...1st Mom: [from facebook]
Mom is still in the hospital tonight. I'm bummed, to be honest. She's doing well. Mick went in for me tonight. Said she walked for a little, with her walker. I'm told she will be moving tomorrow. I'm not sure I believe it now. I kinda want to just hear that in the past tense at this point. We talked for a little on the phone, but she was groggy, so I left her to sleep. Prayerfully tomorrow there will be forward movement.

I was surprised by someone saying I was hiding. I don't feel like I'm trying to, anymore anyway. I was intimidated, at first, with sharing in general.
I've been meaning to..."prepare you all". I put my name in for a contest, online. Never thought I'd win...so I also didn't think about what I'd be agreeing to, if I did. I did win. So, sometime around the end of Oct. beginning of Nov. a picture of me will be on a website. This is the custom of the site. To post pictures of previous winners, with their winnings. I think I've found a unique way to do it. And, yes, I thought of posting a pic of my hands holding my prize... it just seems too lame. I'm going to let them post my name & picture first. When this happens, I'll link to it.
It will be the 3rd time I've been pictured somewhere public.
The first time, was on TV. Not even 30 sec. I'm decorating a tree. Behind local Wgal 8 TV personalities, Kim Lemon & Doug Allen. [I think it Was Doug Allen with her]
The second was a magazine cover. I can say, with much certainty, that most of you have never even heard of the magazine. Hoard's Dairyman was the magazine. The picture was taken at Empire Farm Days, in "upstate New York" as they say. Mom or I probably still have it somewhere.
So this will be the third. Why hide? I've asked myself that since recent listens to Zooropa, the song, from the U2 disc of the same name. In which Bono sings:
"...I've been hiding,
what am I hiding from?..."
I guess I'd have to tell you of some dark days in my life for you to "get it".
Those days... are long behind me now. So I guess if there has been any mystery to who I am, it'll be over when that picture shows up. I'm not scared really. Maybe I should be. Something else my Mother said once comes to mind as well.
"he who has nothing to hide, hides nothing."
And... now I feel like I've gone to great lengths to say nothing really. Except that I've won something, there will be a picture of me holding it [you may or may not be impressed]. You will be able to see it.
Till then enjoy the leaves, I know I will...

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