Silence

Well... here I am.
I don't know if I'm really good at being a friend.
The way I am on facebook is similar to my life. I can be very fun for a while...
& then I'm silent.
I'd say I'm sorry...feels like I say that a lot.
If your really sorry though... you actually change. Then people see that change...
and you're apology is believable.
Hopefully
my apology will become visible in the near future....

some reasons are:
I'm trying to get a grip on my life [or should I say, a better grip]
trying to live more openly/real toward God & Mick
trying to not put things off so much
trying to throw out stuff that just no longer has a purpose in my life
trying to be able to find what I bother to keep [& not trip over it!]


Silence

this
I am good at
like a jazz song
I suddenly flurry online
facebook,
blogs,
posting:
thoughts,
photos,
comments
all at once I'm really friendly
and then
here it comes again
I
am
silent
"is something wrong?"
"can he @ least say so
-or not so?"
I don't
I don't say
anything
I just
"cue crickets"
and I'm silent
I share for a while
then I get frustrated
and, yes, quiet
does it mean I've given up?
does it mean
I'm being mean?
well... not necessarily
it usually doesn't mean
I'm in a mean mood
I guess
sometimes
I'm just afraid
to share
afraid it'll come back
to haunt me
it did, after all,
but that was long ago
but not long
enough ago
I guess.

by B.E. Noll

take care, blessings
B