an autumn poem

Fall

the temparature
then the leaves
the leaves loose their grip
on the tree
they were born from
hang gliding
parashooting
surfing the wind
till they land
like confetti on the ground
drenching the land in color

b.e. noll

there's something about "it"

Ok. So this is a bit uncomfortable for me to "put out there". I was inspired by a story behind a song, to write this next poem. I guess this might be a "beauty & the beast" post. I'd like to think that at least the picture is pretty & calming. Hope it isn't too harsh for you...

it
consumed me
it
was a pale
that all the pieces of me
were kept in
my definition
the bench I sat on
the corner
I disappeared into
it
was all that & more
it
had a receipt
like it owned me
or something
it
had no beginning
& no end
from horizon
to horizon
as far as I was willing to look
it
was there
like graffiti
on my soul
nasty
hopeless
graffiti
the opposite of the cool stuff
Red:1 does
I was never gonna be free from

or get away from
it
somehow…
I had to
cause I’m never gonna
BE
anything
until I escape
it
so I did
I wrote
I carved into paper
my anger
I verbally “threw up”
into notebooks
I rubbed my own blood into them
to kill
it
to silence
it
to “jack it up”
 against
the spine
of my notebook
“you want a piece of this?!?!
come & get it”
“bring it”
cause one of us
has to die
I don’t care if it’s me
just
don’t think I’m gonna
lie there & wait
no
you want to kill me
get in shape boy
you’ll need to
…so
then it was
it or me
wasn’t easy
wasn’t fun
wasn’t short enough
…
with some help
and prayers from many
now
Just me.
it
is dead.

by b.e. noll
 
I took this picture on our Sunday walk @ my Uncle's cabin. In Reed's Gap State Park.

Summer's End

summer's packing it in
waving good-bye to the green leaves
who will soon turn color
& join her
hopping a flight with the geese
who honk as they pass by
The Sun
turns in every night a bit sooner
than previous
carefully tucked in
under a blanket of stars
the moon
his "night light"
to keep us company
and to keep his "chair warm"
till the sun gets up
in the morning
fall will soon be here
natures fireworks
on display
allowing us to miss summer
giving us a chance to rejoice next year
when she returns
by b.e. noll

don't now how or where this came from...

[untitled]
so
here I am
pushing on
boggin down
in the thin stuff
channel surfing
through my own mind
I rewind
I fast forward
I think I know where I'm going
somehow
I forgot I'm supposed to care
& be excited about it
As I watch it it gets fuzzy
looking down the road from here
sometimes I get glimpses
of a good story
is it mine?
should it be?
Which way should I really go
I fight to be mature
like a self absorbed child

this story of mine
I hope it's got a better writer than me
I keep wrestling
the master author
I fight him for the pen
and he lets me win
when I win I sit there with writers block
so I loose by winning
& I win by loosing
I can't seem to get it right
wringing my resistance
out of me
I still get glimpses
of when I'm doing it right
[but glimpses aren't enough for me
I want more
I can't get enough of him
& wonder
why he hasn't had enough of me
yet]

by b.e. noll

today

it's a busy week for me. However this was posted on facebook by a friend & I wanted to link to it today... Makoto Fujimura: shalom Peace, b.e. noll

Still renovating my life. Repairing my existence. Understanding the me that is. Which is why it's been so long since I've posted a poem. For those of you who write, especially poem writers, you owe it to yourself to get to know Over the Rhine. Below is a video that gives 1 reason to like this couple. Another is to read the letters section of their website.
I'll continue to mutter on with this blog for a while. As I discover the hidden places in this soul. ...& whether or not to leave them that way....
May His grace drip from your fingers,
B

another sunday song[s]

I started looking up links to music I like for a friend. so here's another songs on Sunday posting... [warning the Keaggy link is quiet...Randolph is absolutely NOT quiet]
Phil Keaggy & jazz bassist John Patitucci playing "I Shall See God"
Robert Randolph & the Family Band Run for your life, & Jesus is Just Alright

in a different direction...
a friend is going through a tough time right now. Often in my life I've been better at expressing things through songs of others. So here are a few dealing with struggle.

Amy Grant - Somewhere down the Road [became a favorite track after My Sister-in-law lost twins.]
Michael Roe - I need God

Amy Grant - Better Than a Hallelujah
The Swirling Eddies - With the Tired Eyes of Faith

U2 - When I look at the World
[Jesu "...it's no use I can't see what you see, when I look at the world..."]
this list goes on forever by the way. However I'll stop here for now.

The photo @ top is of Linville falls. Sometimes... you feel like that rock, at the bottom. The water is all around you...& your still thirsty. Your immovable... & no one seems to be able to touch you.....& you wish they could...
I'll close with the final song from U2's 360 degrees, live @ the Rose Bowl....
[Moment of Surrender]

May His grace drip from your fingers,
B

Photo by b.e. noll, from my trip to the Blue Ridge.