I'll be here

Last night I ran out. I just didn't want..... anything. Didn't want to eat. So I didn't. I don't let myself skip meals often. Last night, I did. Yesterday had a few "hiccups" yet nothing to make me feel the way I felt. I told a friend in an email about it. They were so very kind:
"... write whenever you want to ... I’ll be here..." 
I really needed to hear..... just that. Just to be told: It's ok. I feel that way too sometimes. I'm not going to think less of you. I love you as you are. 
So beautiful. So necessary. All of us need people like this in our life. 
Anyway, in my Wed night group we talked a bit about the Apostle Paul. Specifically his writings on "the thorn" in his life. We never learn any other name for it. So we don't know what "it" was. 
I think it's a wonderful thing that we don't know what Paul's thorn was. 
Why? Because then we can substitute a struggle of our own in it's place. 
With this in mind, I give you a poem that I wrote. 
I'm kind of scared to share it because I wrote it about a "thorn" in my own life. 
I never name it, of course. I just hate it. Hate that I have to fight it. Hate that I loose. 
However, I keep fighting..... 
so here is the poem,
may it encourage you.....

that

I want you to feel that good

I just don’t want that to be how you get there

You are worth more than that

You

Mean something to people

You

Are important

Your story

Is too beautiful

To have even a sentence wasted on that

So please

Run

As fast & as far

Away from that as you possibly can

Please stop thinking you don’t matter

You do

Not kidding

No exaggeration

You need to have joy

Ecstasy

That is just the wrong way to get there

Ok?

So please step away from there

Move into where you are loved

You are loved

You need to be loved

You

Are beautiful

Your story

Is better than that

Your story

Is wonderful

You have amazing characters

In your story

There are amazing chapters

In your story

Don’t let them be ruined

There’s too much at stake

You are too beautiful

To be soiled

Like that

So don’t let that

Be the end

Don’t let that

Put a shadow

On you

On your story

Too many people

Are invested

In you

In your story

Walk away from that

Don’t walk away

Alone

Your too much fun

To do that

live into a better story....

b.e. noll

May His grace drip from your fingers,
B