bought "as is"

I don't want to be on here long tonight.
However, I had an interesting incident today. I ran into my abuser today. Well...not physically into or vehicularly. We were in the same place today. As I was "out & about". Did my Chick-fil-A lunch, stopped at Wal-mart [a pit stop, & candy cane tootsie pops -mmm]. We didn't have a deep conversation. We joked. Kept it light. ...and did not touch each other. I don't want to hurt him, if he touched me...I might. Without even thinking. For a long time I thought it would be a really bad thing for us to be in the same place. so, this is progress. I don't want to hate him. It's a waste of my time, my energy. I feel it is a slander of Jesus. I know for some of you this is unthinkable. How can you forgive him?! I don't know... ask Jesus how he can forgive me... his answer... is probably mine, too.

"unforgiveness is like waking up everyday, & drinking poison, hoping someone else will die."

I want to say more. I just need to sleep.
so I'll leave you with a song that's been grabbing me lately.
Casting Crowns - God is With Us 
"...Your the savior
we
have been praying for
in our humble hearts
You will
dwell 
You are
in us
You are
for us
You are
with
us
Emmanuel"

Jesus,
thank you
though
you did not
take away what happened
to me
you never ran & hid
either
You
were there
so
even though
someone else
made my bed in hell
you
lay down next to me
there
There are
no words
to describe you
no words
are tough enough
to stand & accurately
portray
who you are
what you can do
...or how far you will
[& have]
gone to show
how valuable
we are to you...

still need you
and will
for an
endless
unfolding
series
of eternities. 
yours
B